A child is born...

On 10/26 we welcomed our baby girl, Anneliese Kenta Lommen, into the world.  The delivery was (mostly) uneventful and baby and mom are happy and healthy at home.  She has been such a good baby and, though we're biased, we think she's beautiful. 

Home of the Brave

I am so proud of my family.  I look at my two little ones and I think about all they have been through and every good and bad thing they have experienced in their short lives.  Yet, every morning they get up, get dressed, trust us to care for them, feed them and love them.  They go into a school and they are brave enough to keep trying to speak the language, interact with kids their age and try all kinds of new things.  They do these things without fear and it is awe-inspiring.

By the same token, Leigh and I have  adopted two kids, moved, started new jobs and now have a little one days from making her entry and, although it's been tough, we've taken it in stride and somehow have managed to keep these kids happy, productive and adaptable. 

When I think about all these things I think about how there are very few people I know that would be courageous enough (or dumb enough?) to embark on this journey.  Maybe it was foolhardy, but I prefer to think of it as simply brave.  My home of the brave.

Reluctantly, but by popular demand

Many of you have been curious about what I look like 9 months pregnant.  I'm not sure what all the interest is about.  Maybe because I'm so old to be pregnant for the first time, or because I've always been so thin?  Anyway, I figured I'm likely only going to be pregnant just this once, so I had a proper pregnancy portrait taken.  Hope it satisfies all the curiosity!

The pregnancy has, overall, been going well.  However, last week I had an ultrasound and it showed I had a low level of amniotic fluid and a "non-stress test" I had on the baby in the hospital showed I was having a good deal of contractions that I wasn't feeling.  These things together led my doctor to put me on bedrest for the rest of the pregnancy, so I officially went off work and on leave last week.  Since then, I've had another ultrasound that shows that the amniotic  fluid increased with the bedrest so they were pleased with that progress.  As of today, I'm at 36 and 1/2 weeks, so our little one will arrive any day now.  Keep us all in your thoughts and prayers.

Our friend the Ocean

The kids love the ocean.  When we go, they could stay for hours and hours and the biggest challenge is getting them to leave.  The most recent time we took them we told them we were just going to walk on the beach and not get in the ocean because it was (relatively) cool outside.  Just as we thought they would, they still ran in full throttle and got doused by the waves.  Below is the picture of that evening and them playing with their best friend, the sea.

Moving along

As we get more settled in, we have a little more time to breathe and thus, a blog post.  Since the last posting, my parents have relocated to Jacksonville and are settling in to a nice apartment complex across the streee from our community, and they are really enjoying it.  Leigh's folks, Dick and Cherry Lommen, just finished a whirlwind trip to see us where they helped us with our house with everything from changing light fixtures to hanging paintings.  It was a HUGE help.  They did in a couple of days, what would take Leigh and I a couple of months.

The kids have started school (photo attached) and are doing well, becoming more comfortable with the language, with us, with their environment every day.  They have also cultivated a real love of the ocean and of boating and surfing and they are great swimmers and going to the beach is one of our favorite family activities.

I am getting increasingly larger, now waddling, with just 5 weeks to go until my due date.  Soon our two ring circus will officially become a three ring circus. Viva Lommenpalooza!

Yes, we're expecting another.

As I put in my last post, we're expecting another addition to our family in the end of October (I'm hoping for early October!).  We weren't really talking about it because of all the other things that are happening in our lives, but now, as with many pregnancies, we just can't ignore it any more. 

Our little one is a girl, and she has been a lesson to me that, above all, your children are their own independant being.  This little one has been through her mommy travelling to Ethiopia, working, moving in the hot Florida summer and taking care of other kids.  She's heard her brother and sister began to talk and she's felt the ocean waves.  Through all this, she just keeps growing and moving.  Here's a picture of her little feet, that I'm guessing will be pretty big when they come out, based on the kicks!  The Ob says she's long and skinny and should be a great runner.  I think she's practicing already with the bulk of her jogging practice at night when Mom is trying to sleep :)

Too busy for blogging...

Well, I'm not sure we have any more followers out there since I haven't made in entry in over 8 weeks.  Sorry all.  With the move, the two new little ones and my pregnancy (I realize I haven't announced that yet on the blog), it's been just too busy to blog.

Here's a summary of what has happened over the past 8 weeks:
1. We had three great partied for our departure and the arrival of our little ones.  Thanks everyone for all the stuff.  The movers thank you too because it made our loads heavier!
2. We sold two homes, bought a home and moved into it in late July, in Florida.  Hot and humid is not ideal weather for moving and it made us all tired and cranky and slow.  But we're almost completely unpacked and we have all of our cars in the garage, so seems like an end is in sight.
3. I have announced broadly that I'm pregnant because, well, there's just no denying it now.  I'm at 31 weeks and waddling.  My belly button is now and outy.  My due date is October 29th, so stay tuned.
4. Endrias and Bethel have started picking up the language and we are all having a great time.  In the last 8 weeks they have learned how to fish, how to swim, ridden on a variety of boats, taken a private plane ride, learned how to work Mommy and Daddy's phones, cameras, televisions, played tennis, learned how to ride bikes (no training wheels for Endrias after about 10 days), received a collective total of 15 immunizations, 5 doctors visits, 4 dentist visits, 3 fillings and 8 sealants, learned how to take pills and how to "chipmunk" pills to spit out later, met a new nanny, love "swamp people" and started school.
5. Leigh has started a company and is actively building it's infrastructure.  It's called Parallax Quantitative Asset Management.  It has something to do with using statistics and computers to make money in the market, whether it goes up or down, but that's the best I can explain it.  He has an office and he's also working full time as a quantitative analyst consultant for a NYC based firm.
6. I started back to work at Mayo Clinic Florida as a gastroenterologist and have an administrative position in the Department of Medicine.
7. Arranged for an apartment for my folks, Stan and Irene, to relocate here.  Stan (80) fell and broke his hip and had a hip replacement around the fourth of July.  Ironic switch from independance to dependance on that day. :(

Sigh...so you can understand why I haven't been blogging.

I've attached a few pictures, but frankly, we're behind on the picture taking too.  These pictures were sent to me by my lovely and talented sister-in-law Wendy Lommen.

Claire Lommen and Bethel

The Lommen Cousins at Lommen Grandparent's House

Bethel with her first Shirley Temple looking pretty in pink.

Coming home photos

I have a few moments with Endrias playing quietly and Bethel asleep, so I'll try to post a few more pictures.  The kids are doing great.  Every day they speak more in English and certainly understand more and the frustration between all parties with the language barrier lessens.  We're getting used to the routine that works for all of us which involves no nap for Endrias (because he's up too late otherwise) and late afternoon nap for Bethel.  The kids have been to the pediatrician's office where they each received five immunizations at once (tough day for all of us), to the lab to get their blood drawn and to the dentist office.  They don't know yet that Mommy is a doctor, but when they learn about that, I think they'll like me less.

They love to go to the park and to play outside, so it's great that they came in the Summer. They've been to the library, to the store, out to eat and they do love all of that.  The first thing Endrias wants to do every morning is "Mommy, machina!"  which means "Mom, let's go somewhere in the car!"  If it's raining, I still go in the car and park near one of Rochester's many construction sites so they can watch the heavy equipment and the workers which they love.  Every couple of seconds one of them says "Mommy!  Ooooh!"

Endrias has learned how to use a camera and so has been taking lots of pictures with an old camera of mine.  Some of them are really good!  I'll download some of those as soon as we locate the camera again...

The problem with blogging.

I know many of you are anxious to see new and more pictures of the kids and hear how it's going.  The problem is that we're so busy with taking care of them that we have little time to tell everyone how it's going and upload photos.  I will do as time allows.  Essentially, the kids are great.  They are loving, generally happy, eating well and potty trained.  Once they are asleep they stay asleep, but getting them to go to sleep has been a challenge: they are jet lagged, in new surroundings with new beds and their own rooms.  That's getting better every day, but it has left Leigh and I pretty tired.

They are learning the language with Endrias having about 100 word vocabulary and Bethel about 20 words.  They speak to each other in fluent and long conversations in their native tongue, so I know it's just a matter of time before they switch over. 

They are both very sweet kids.  Endrias is very inquisitive, athletic, smart and active.  Bethel is sweet and cuddly and loves all things girlish.

Our hearts burst with love for them and we are so glad to have them home.  Our lives our changed and we are so much richer for their presence. 

Bringing them home.

Going away ceremony at Care Center in Addis Ababa.  Bethelihem (left) and Endrias (right) with Leigh and Grandma Cherry.  Kids are in traditional Ethiopian outfits for the ceremony.

Bethelihem and Endrias looking out the window at the Lucy Land guest house after Leigh had taken custody.

Leigh at the U.S. Embassy for the visa interview for the kids.  This was the last step of the long legal process (a process that started in May 2010).

Leigh with the kids at the Care Center where they have been the last 6 weeks, waiting for us to bring them home.

Endrias and Bethelihem with some of their nannies at the Care Center.

Above you'll see pictures from the trip to Ethiopia to bring the kids home.  Overall, the trip went really well with minimal hiccups and no illnesses.  The trip was a great bonding experience for Leigh with the kids.  Grandma Cherry found it a life-changing experience.  Both were touched by the love shown for our kids by all those involved.  They have given us two very loving, affectionate, beautiful kids whose smile just breaks the heart.

Pictures at last.

Leigh, his mother Cherry, Endrias and Bethelihem walked through the doors and into our lives at 12:45 today.  The kids were great on the trip with only minor meltdowns and, after having been in transit for 26 hours, got into the car, strapped into their car seats (a totally foreign concept) and rode the hour and a half drive without incident.  We introduced them to their new surroundings, let them play about an hour, gave them a bath and put them to bed (which took about an hour of dedicated time for each of them).  They did all that with very little resistance, especially given that we don't speak the same language.  They are very happy kids and very affectionate, and as you can see, adorable.  We don't have pictures of the homecoming yet as they were taken with Cherry's camera.  We'll try to load new pictures in the coming days.  For now just peace and rest.

The end of the world as we know it (and I feel fine)

Tomorrow at noon I'll meet Leigh, Endrias and Bethelihem at the airport in Minneapolis after their 24 hour trip.  I've tried to make everything ready in their rooms, in the house in my heart.  So what shall I do this last night alone?  I've eaten a nice dinner, I'm watching my favorite show on TV and then I'm going to go to bed early and get up late.  And tomorrow will be the start of our new world.

Message from Grandma Cherry

This is a message I had in my inbox this morning from Grandma Cherry (Leigh's mom) about her experience so far with the kids in their Care Center as they are waiting to take custody on Monday:

WOW!!!  What an incredible experience!!

When I saw the children walk in the room at the care center, I was overcome with emotion!  Endrias hugged me so long and hard, it was really heart warming.  Leigh held Bethel and she hugged him for so long as well!

There were immediate smiles from both of them.  They were fascinated with the small flashlights that I brought.  They loved trying on my glasses and sunglasses. They love my little retractable tape measure as I measured their sizes.  Endrias ended up measuring everything in the room! They took my pens and scribbled...Endrias was able to print his name with a little help.  He is a very smart boy!!!

The care center said he is so special.  He plays so well with other children as well as watches over his sister.  You could see their incredible interaction.  He is so disciplined.  He goes and washes his hands without being told, pushes his chair in...he's mature way beyond his years.

We were there during lunch.  They both ate very well.  Endrias cleaned his plate and Bethel did quite well, but it took her a loooong time!
Later, I brought out snacks.  They enjoyed the animal crackers, but the biggest his was the "confetti marsh mellows" 
they are about one inch long.  the kids loved them and then Leigh put some in his mouth like they were teeth.  The kids laughed so hard!!!  Dawn, I think you have three children coming home, not two!!

We are shopping this morning and then we spend the afternoon with the kids.  Tomorrow, we bring them back to the Jamimah House, now renamed Lucy Land House.  I brought lots of crafts to keep them busy for the next four days!

They are incredible kids full of love and promise.  They will be special gifts to all of us.

Thank you so much, Dawn for allowing me to come.  It has been one of the highlights of my life!!  I love them so much already!!!

On the way...

Leigh and his mom Cherry are now in Ethiopia.  Dawn had to stay home and keep the home fires burning.  This way one of us will be totally refreshed when the kids come home and the kids and Leigh are exhausted.  The visa interview is on Monday, June 6, they should get the visas on June 8 and then everyone gets on the plane for the long trip home on June 9.  They'll arrive in Minneapolis on June 10 at noon.  Finally, finally, they're on their way home.

We have a date. They're coming home!

We got the news today that the visa interview date in Ethiopia at the U.S. Embassy is June 6th.  We'll leave Ethiopia on June 9th and the kids will land in the U.S., as U.S. citizens, on June 10th.  They'll be home at last and we'll be able to share their beautiful faces with you.  Keep us in your thoughts and prayers during this exciting and busy time.

In the mean time and with typical Lommenpalooza style, we are working on our move to Jacksonville, FL.  We listed our home in Rochester on Friday last week and had a contract on Monday.  It really couldn't have gone better, especially in this market.  We feel so blessed that, although we have a lot going on, the moving parts are moving smoothly.  Dawn goes to Florida this weekend to try and find a house there and to interview nannies.  Yahoo!

Invitation for Visa Interview

We received an invitation from the U.S. Embassy today for a visa interview. This is the final step in the process. Our embassy interview should be June 6,7 or 8. On that trip we will bring them home. So around three weeks from now, Bethel and Endrias will be with us forever!

Embassy Submission

We just got news that our case has been submitted to the U.S. Embassy.  While there are no guarantees (boy is that a lesson we have learned well), typically the kids come home about 4-6 weeks after embassy submission.  The wheels are turning!

What are we waiting for?

We haven't entered a post for a while because we haven't had any news to enter. Many of you have asked what it is that we're waiting for. Well...to the best of our knowledge our adoption agency is still preparing our file to be submitted to the US embassy. This preparation involves issuing a new birth certificate and US passport for each child. The agency also closely reviews all of our documents up to this point to make sure they are all correct and can stand up to scrutiny of the embassy. Our agency quoted 8-16 weeks from our court date to submission and we are now on week 8, so things are proceeding as scheduled. Half of the couples we travelled with have been submitted to the embassy, so our hope is that our turn is coming soon.

Typically, the embassy will grant an interview for the kids' visa about three weeks after a case has been submitted to them. That interview is the last step in the process and when complete we can bring the kids home!

So, that's what we're waiting for.

Kids on the move.

We were told this week that our kids have been moved from their care center in South Ethiopia to the capitol city, Addis Ababa.  Typically, the kids are moved as the time for us to pick them up draws near, so we take this as a good sign, for us.  For them, it will be leaving their part of the world for the first time.  The trip to Addis is likely their first trip in a car; it will be the first time they've seen a paved road, buildings, street lights, so many people.  They will also have left behind the village of their birth family and the nannies that have been caring for them for the past 8 months.  We know they are resilient and strong, but our hearts ache for all the change they have had to endure in their little lives.  What a journey for us all.

A decree!

We had unexpected and good news today. We were awaiting a second court date for the adoption attorney in Ethiopia so a final adoption decree could be issued for our family. Today we heard that the letter from the Ethiopian Ministry of Women, Youth and Child Affairs we were awaiting had been sent to the court and the court issued a final decree for our adoption without a second court date. This means that now we are only waiting for new birth certificates, then passports, then an interview with the U.S. embassy. When we get called for an interview with the U.S. embassy is when we make our final trip to Ethiopia to pick up our kids. Hopefully that will be in the next 8-12 weeks, barring a government shut down here or there...

No news is no news

We still don't have any news about a second court date or any progress on our case from the
Ethiopia side. In this case, I don't think no news is good news, it's just no news.

In the meantime we've been working to try and make things as smooth as possible from this end, but it's challenging without having an idea about when the kids will come. Enrolling in school and securing childcare are our biggest tasks but hard to do when we don't really even have a ballpark estimate for when they are coming home. Patience...I'm learning.

Delays

Up until the point of the court date on March 14, we were expecting delays in the adoption process.  We thought, though, that after the court date it would be mostly smooth sailing until we bring the kids home 8 to 12 weeks later.

Unfortunately, we have had some bad news.  All of the couples that went to court on March 14 were lacking a letter from the Ethiopian Ministry of Women, Youth and Child Affairs that we need to get the court decree that is then sent to the US embassy for approval.  We are waiting now for the Holt lawyer who is working on our behalf to be given a court date to go back to court in hopes that they will have the letter by that date.  Apparently, there is no way to know whether or not that letter has been received by the court prior to court, so it's possible that at the second court date the letter still isn't there and we have to go through the process again.  As of yet, we don't have a second court date for the lawyer.  I guess one blessing is we don't have to appear again in court.

Our agency isn't able to give us any definitive answers about how long the delay will be so we have nothing to do but try and be patient and wait.

Ethiopia Post Script

I wanted to register some observations about Ethiopia as a country.  Our trip to Africa was not our first foray into the developing world so we weren't shocked by some of the things that might be shocking to others: extreme poverty, pollution, and disease.  Ethiopia certainly has all those things.  Yet, the things that stood out to me were the quiet confidence, grace and warmth of the people and their striking beauty.  They are so hospitable with their "coffee ceremony" that welcomed us to every hotel, restaurant and even the care center where our children are.  The people have such lovely smiles.  The food is spicy and exotic.  The countryside is varied and beautiful.

When I go to Latin America, it strikes me how prominent women are in society: you see them in the home, at work, out and about.  It's clear how important they are in the culture. It's a place of women.  India, I think, is a place of young men.  There are few women or children in view but in every public place from upscale shops to ancient tombs there were young men.
In contrast, Ethiopia is a country of children.  In every situation, every place, there are children alone; begging, walking on the streets, working.  We saw children that looked the age of 6 or 7 herding cattle, driving carts pulled by donkeys.   It is so different from anything I've seen before and underscores the continued tragedy of this and many impoverished countries in Africa: there are just too many children alone.  In sub-Saharan Africa it's estimated there are 48 million, yes million orphans.  What we are doing can't change the enormity of that problem, but it changes it for our two kids.

We are so proud of Ethiopia.  Proud of it's history as the birthplace of humanity.  Proud of it's rich culture and heritage.  And especially proud that of all the countries in Africa that have an overwhelming number of orphans and children in need, it stands as one of the few that have a stable enough government, strong enough infrastructue, and deep enough committment to their children to allow for international adoption and for that, we are forever grateful.

Lucky?

We often get the comment that our kids are so "lucky" that we are adopting them. This is one of the most annoying things an adoptive parent can hear. Every child deserves a home. Children born into a stable home with a nice house and family aren't reminded continually that they are lucky for having such a normal life. It's taken for granted.

For our kids to wind up in an orphanage at their tender age through no fault of their own is profoundly unlucky. When they come home with us they will have lost everything: their birth family, their country, their culture, their language. It will be akin to being abducted by aliens.

On the other hand, we have been allowed to bring these two beautiful babies into our home who have characteristics and talents that are no credit to us; who bring in a light into our boring life; who have expanded our horizons further than we ever thought we could go, and this is just the beginning. Lucky? Yes. We are the lucky ones.

Court Day, Meet Date: March 14, 2011

Today we all (six couples) piled into a van and went to Holt International's office in Ethiopia.  We were briefed on what would happen in court and for the rest of the day.  Our appearance in court was for us to confirm, in person, to the court that we had met the kids and that we wanted them.  It was also the day for the person that relinquished the child for adoption to appear in court and confirm their wishes for the child to be adopted.  This could be a parent, family member or person that found the child if they were abandoned.

We then travelled to the court where we stood in a room waiting for the judge to see us.  In the room we were with other adoptive parents and also with the people that were confirming their wishes for the child to be adopted.  We knew it was likely that the person that brought our kids to the orphanage was in the room, but we weren't sure who it was.  Very eerie.

We were called into the judge's chambers with two other couples and the judge asked the group several questions, "Have you educated yourself on international adoption and the identity issues that can arise later? Have you educated yourself on the history of Ethiopia?  Do you understand that if you agree, the adoption is final and nothing can break it?"  To all of this we answered "yes."  And the judge said, "then it is so."

That was it.

We all went out to lunch and then back to the Holt office to meet the person that had reliquished the kids for adoption.  We aren't going to share the details of this because they are private and only for Endrias and Bethelihem to know when they are ready.  We keep these details in a "life book" that is only for them to have.  If later in life they want to share that with others, it will be their choice.  We do this because we recognize that with adoption, there is always some pain and that pain causes scars that don't need to be re-exposed by talking to everyone about their history.  When and if they're ready, they can share it.

I will say this.  As joyful as we are to have these children in our lives, there is an equal amount of suffering and tragedy for another family.  In our world, we have no concept of what it is like to have to make the choice between a child dying of starvation or giving them up.   It also takes so much committment for these people to bring a child to a care center for adoption.  These are people with so little: often illiterate, without a profession, home, shoes.  They have to come to the care center, be interviewed on three separate occasions with separate social workers and be willing to be transported the 6 hours of bad road to the capitol city for a court date where they will lose three days of wages if they have them.  It takes so much fortitude and love to go through all that to try to bring a child into a better life.  We have come to accept that the love of these people for our children to relinquish them to us is more profound than we could have imagined.  It is not an act of weakness, it is an act of strength and it comes at great cost for them.  We have looked that in the face, and we are forever changed.

The Longest Night, The Longest Minute: March 11, 2011

I should have known something wasn't right when we pulled into the parking lot of our hotel and there were vultures sitting on the trees.

We checked in to the Hotel Lewi at around 5:30 pm in Awassa and I promptly went to bed.  The room was hot with no air conditioning, but this was Malaria and Yellow Fever country and we didn't want to let any mosquitos in (the windows didn't have screens). Leigh got up at 7 pm and had dinner with some of the other couples and I stayed in bed.  He came back to the room, we watched a really bad movie and went to sleep under a mosquito net at around 9:30 pm.  I had ear plugs in because there was a club next door with lots of activity given it was a Saturday night.

At 12:30 am, I heard Leigh get up and go to the bathroom (despite having the earplugs in).  I asked him if he was okay, no answer.  I heard him moaning, and I got out of bed and knocked on the bathroom door, "Leigh are you okay?"  No answer.  I open the door and he's on the toilet, very pale, and says, "I don't feel good." 
"What's the matter?"
"I don't know, I don't feel good."
"Does something hurt you?"
"Just leave me alone.  Give me a minute, will you?"

I close the door and stand outside.

And then, whack.  I hear him hit the floor.

I open the door, and what I saw is still burned in my memory.  My husband, pale on the floor -which he hit face first - with a bleeding mouth, eyes open and totally unresponsive.  I start shaking him "Leigh are you alright?  Leigh wake up!"  Nothing.  I try to turn him over so I can start CPR on him, but he's too big, I can't move him.  I pick up the phone and dial the front desk and say "I need an ambulance, my husband collapsed."  As I am talking to the them Leigh starts to move.

The desk staff says "No ambulance, I'm coming up."  I say, "I don't need you, I need an ambulance, I need a doctor."  Desk staff, "There's no ambulance, no doctor, I'm coming up."  I hang up.

Leigh, in the meantime has tried to stand up and has collapsed again, this time on his rear, and still conscious.  He's very confused.  I yell at him not to get up.  He says "I want to go to bed."  I yell at him he must crawl, he can't fall again.  He crawls to the bed.  He is very hot and sweaty and pale.  I try to feel his pulse but can't feel it.  I give him an antibiotic we had with us, tylenol and make him start drinking water.

By now the desk staff comes and asks how to help.  I say to get one of the other guys on the trip who is an internist/hospitalist.  Unfortunately, all the hotel rooms with our people were listed under the adoption agency name, so he had to knock on lots of doors before he found them.  We also had a nurse on the trip and both came and stepped into action.  We rubbed him down with cool towels, put cold packs (that I had brought) under his neck and arms and made him drink, drink, drink.  Finally we got a thready pulse and he became less confused.

He had a big bump on his head, a red eye (he fell on his head, eye) and a cut tongue from biting it when he fell.  Once things settled down a little, everyone left and it was just Leigh and I.  Then he got terrible chills alternating with fever that over the night gradually lessened.  I woke him up every hour to make sure he was conscious given the head injury.  I went with him to the bathroom every time.  I made him drink 7 liters of water (for you medical folks, half of them had electrolytes I added in). 

We were both really scared.  If he got worse, we didn't really have a recourse and we didn't know what was wrong with him to begin with.  Our driver was staying outside the hotel and we couldn't get in touch with him.  There was no ambulance, no hospital nearby.  I realized, this is the way all of these people feel with a sick child or loved one: helpless.

Fortunately, Leigh improved as the night went on, and by morning he was starting to feel close to normal.  We're still not sure why this happened.  I can tell you though, to have your spouse become unresponsive in rural Africa is a terrible, terrible feeling and that night was the longest one I have ever endured.

The Longest Day, The Shortest Hour: March 11, 2011

This morning we set out at 6:00 am from our bed and breakfast in the capitol city, Addis Abeba to travel to see our kids in the southern part of the country.  There are six couples all traveling.  We crammed into a van and Leigh and I were in the very back seat.  For the first three hours of the trip, the road was paved, but still with lots of bumps and Dawn got a bit sick from it.  After three hours, we all piled out of the van to a cafe where we had a short break for bathrooms and refreshments and Leigh stayed in the back, Dawn moved to the front.  Two hours later (five hours total), the van turned onto a rough dirt road and another van met up with us to take the two of us to where are kids are in Woylaita, a different location than the other families whose kids are at a care center in Durame.

We then travelled another hour, had lunch in the small village where our care center is (see picture below) and proceeded on to see the kids.

We were expecting that we would be brought into the center, introduced to the staff and then brought to a room where the kids were and introduced as visitors.  In fact, we walked into the front door, and there they were.  Beautiful Endrias and Bethelihem.  They were expecting us.  They were told we were "mom" and "dad."

I had sent them cards in November with our pictures in them and explaining who we were and why it would take so long for us to come and get them.  They still had the cards and they knew what we looked like.  Endrias had been asking his nannies when his parents were going to come and today was the day and he knew it.

It's hard to explain the surreal experience of walking into a room and meeting your kids.  That's just what happened though.  Endrias is very emotive with a warm smile and very affectionate.  He sang a couple of songs to us and he has a beautiful voice with perfect pitch and rhythm.  He has such wonderful expressive eyes (again, to protect their privacy and out of the respect of the Ethiopian people and government, we can't show their pictures).

Bethelihem is stunningly beautiful with a perfectly shaped face, eyes and lips.  She is very reserved around adults.  The nannies said she interacts and talks to her peers and to her brother, but it's very difficult to get her to interact with adults.  That said, she was content to have us hold her, cuddle her, feed her.  She was happy to have Leigh carry her around, and the only emotion she showed was a reluctance to let go of his neck when it was time to put her down for us to go. 

The children and their nannies speak Woylaita which is one of 80 languages spoken in Ethiopia.  The national language is Amharic, but in this remote place, most people don't speak it.  As such, we won't have a dictionary to look up what are kids are saying, so the first several weeks/months is likely going to be frustrating for everyone.

All told, we spent an hour with them.  Playing with them, asking their caretakers to tell us words for common things like "I'm hungry, I'm tired, I have to go the bathroom," what they like to eat (Endrias says "meat, eggs, spaghetti and macaroni"; all stuff I can cook) and what their sleep schedule is like.  We found out what types of toys they like to play with (mostly blocks) and what they like to do.  It was precious, and then it was over. 

The hour flew by and it was time for us to go.  Leaving them was one of the hardest things we've ever had to do.  We asked the nannies to tell them that we are coming back for them, which they did several times.  The children have seen this many times: parents coming, meeting kids, and then around 2 months later the kids get transported to the capitol city in anticipation of the parents return.  We were so afraid they thought that we didn't want them, but the seemed to understand what was going on.

We got back in the van, and cried as it took us to meet the other group of parents as they left their care center in Durame.  Once we met up with the other group, we all piled into a van together and were taken another three and a half hours up a bumpy dirt road to Awassa to stay the night.  We were exhilirated and exhausted, elated and depressed.  We settled in for a good night's sleep.

Good Morning Ethiopia: March 10 2011

After 28 hours of traveling we arrived at Bole airport in Addis Abeba at 10 pm local time.  Our adoption agency, Holt International, had a driver waiting for us and he wisked us off to the hotel where we are staying.  The staff are very friendly, the accommodations are modern and we promptly went to bed, slept 9 hours, got up for breakfast, went back to bed  and slept another 7 hours.  Now it’s 5 pm and we’re just “hangin’ out.”  The hotel is close to the airport but fairly sequestered with a guard, gate, high walls and razor wire.  We’ve been told to only go out with an “approved” car and driver, which we had scheduled for 2 pm today, but slept through.  Ah well.

From what we can see, Addis Abeba is lovely surrounded by mountains and with a clear blue sky above.  The Ethiopians we have encountered in the airport and our hotel are beautiful people with warm smiles and calm demeanors.

Tomorrow morning we will leave at 6:30 am with a group of adoptive parents to Durame, the village with the orphanage where our kids are.  We will have an opportunity to spend several hours with the kids, but our understanding is that we’ll be introduced as “visitors” since the adoption isn’t finalized.  We’ll have to take the lead from our professionals at the adoption agency on how we conduct ourselves because it seems like it will be awkward.  Of course, we’ll want to stretch our arms around them and hug and kiss them, but that is likely not allowed and would probably be terrifying for them given that they don’t know who we are and we are probably amongst only a handful of white people they have ever seen.  In any event, we are so excited and overwhelmed and thrilled to be here in this moment, this turning point of our (and their) lives.

Fallen off the edge of the earth (or just the grid)

We know many of you have been logging in to the blog to follow our trip to Ethiopia.
Though we were warned that access to the internet may be slow or unreliable, we interpreted that with American eyes. The reality is that we had almost no access to the internet that was fast enough even to handle e-mail. The best internet cafe we could find still did not have enough capacity for me to even open the blog to enter. So, sorry to disappoint. In contrast, I'm entering into the blog right now as we drive back to Rochester from Minneapolis with my 3G enabled IPad.

We had an extremely eventful trip. I don't want to skip on any of the details, so I'm going to enter just as if the events are happening in real time, starting tomorrow. For tonight, we just need to rest from what has been the trip of a lifetime.

On our way

Well, we are sitting in the Amsterdam airport after our first leg of the trip. Soon we will board another plane for another 8 hour flight to Addis Ababa, the capital city of Ethiopia. So far so good...

Charmed

The picture above is of a lovely charm necklace my friend Julie Nordeen gave to me soon after we received the referral for Endrias and Bethelihem.  She knows how important it is to have something to touch to remind us that this is real.  The gold charm has a "B" on it for Bethel, because she's small and precious.  The round silver charm has "E" for Endrias, because he's bigger and stronger and Bethel's protector.  The square charm has "Once upon a time" inscribed, because our story as a family started "once upon a time, far far away."  Thanks Julie for this thoughtful and precious gift.  I will wear it to Ethiopia when we meet our kids on Saturday, when it all becomes so real.

Concerns Over Ethiopia Adoption News Report

There has been a news story from a single source (Voice of America) reporting that the Ethiopian government agency responsible for processing international adoptions will cut the number of cases they review from 50 to 5 per day.  We have had several friends and family contact us about this change and how it might affect our adoption.  The short answer is, we're not sure.  First, this story has yet to be confirmed by other sources.  It is not currently listed as an alert on the U.S.  Department of State website.  Second, if it is true, we don't really know whether it will affect our family given that we already have a court date in Ethiopia.  In the meantime, we have our bags packed and our ready to get on an airplane on Wednesday 3/9/11. 

The adoption journey is a bumpy one for everyone involved.  We are committed to being flexible and calm throughout the process and understand that there are many variables that can impact us along the way.  We appreciate your support and prayers and we will keep you all updated on the process as soon as we have news.

Travel Plans

A week from now we will be tossing and turning in anticipation for our first trip to Ethiopia.  We have started packing (well, I have) and gathering all the things we need: hand sanitizer, mosquito repellant, various medications for all sorts of eventualities.  We are also bringing school supplies for a favorite charity, "Love for Ethiopia."

We have been working on gifts to bring Endrias and Bethelihem on our first meeting.  Our agency has told us we can't bring toys or clothes or jewelry, but something that will be uniquely theres and can be shared with others.  So we put together a photobook for each of them that has their names on the front and pictures of them and of us and our dog Max all in the same book.  Our first family album.  We hope that they will look at the books in the coming weeks and begin to understand how we all fit together.

We expect it to be 8 - 12 weeks between our first visit and our second when we bring them home.  We are so excited for the profound and monumental change we know this will be.

Cold outside, warm inside

We have a pre-Spring storm outside, but we've spent a good bit of the weekend making Endrias and Bethel's rooms warm and comfy.  We're having a problem though.  We have no idea what three and four year olds need.  We went to Toys R Us to just walk around and see what we don't have, but we came away with a couple of sippy cups and some small eating utensils and that's about it.  We did get some pretty cute bedding though and their rooms and play rooms are coming along nicely.

New pictures

Today our adoption agency sent us updated pictures of Bethel and Endrias. We can't share them because of sensitivity on the part of the Ethiopian culture and rules of our agency. We are sort of partial, but these are beautiful kids we are bringing home.

The beginning of blogdom

Welcome to our blog!  Given that we have so much planned for the next couple of months, we wanted to provide a way for our friends and family to follow what's going on.  Most importantly, we want to keep you up to date on the process of the adoption for our little ones, Endrias and Bethelihem.  We received word last week that our first court date in Ethiopia is March 14th.  We will leave on March 9th, land the evening of March 10th and then travel to the South, 7 hours by dirt road, to meet our kids for the first time in the orphanage they are in.  We will be introduced as visitors, so as not to disappoint if, for some reason the adoption falls through.  On Monday, March 14th we will stand before and Ethiopian judge and he will ask us questions about why we want to adopt and about our lives and fitness as parents.  Then (hopefully) he will declare the adoption finalized in Ethiopia and we return home.

The court decree is then sent to the U.S. Embassy where all of the paperwork is examined and visas are issued.  Once the visas are ready for the kids (typically takes 8-12 weeks) we will go back and pick the kids up.  When they put their feet on U.S. soil, they will be U.S. citizens.

We will be taking pictures and blogging during our journey.  However, we will not be posting pictures of the kids and we won't be divulging any of the personal or sensitive information about their situation.  This is out of respect to them and to the people of Ethiopia.  Once they are home, we'll post lots of pictures!

This is truly a life-changing experience for us.  We feel so blessed to be part of this process and we are grateful that we have the resources to give these two young ones a solid home.  They have been dealt a difficult hand already in their short lives and we hope that we can make their lives better.  We have all confidence that they will turn our worlds upside down and we know they will bring a sweetness to our lives.  In all of this, we are the lucky ones.